A personal history of the elegant, intricate gharara – and how to make one in a pandemic

My cousin, Tee, relinquished her oath of singlehood, got her ears pierced and was besieged with intense gharara pangs. She would not, like the rest of us, wait for the groom’s family to bring the wedding gharara. Making your own bridal gharara was unheard of in a conservative Muslim family in 2005, but one could only expect the unexpected from Tee. The besotted groom decided to spin a story about a designer friend making the gharara and we, the sisterhood of cousins, busied ourselves in making Tee’s trousseau and the all-important nikah gharara.

The gharara is a pair of wide-legged pajamas worn with a tunic and a dupatta. A farshi gharara, which Tee craved, has a train that would trail behind on the floor – the “farsh”. For a North Indian Muslim bride, the gharara ensemble is the essence of the nuptials. The groom’s family is judged by the bridal ensemble offered and the bride sees it as a testimony of the love of her future family. My mother wept seeing her sister’s too-plain wedding gharara, feeling sure that the sister would have to endure a tough, married life.

Like Tee, I too desired a farshi gharara trailing behind me, held by my teary-eyed...

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